I'm Not Made of Steel
by thisentireaccountembarrassesme
Summary: Gakuto isn't made of steel. He can hardly contain the whimpers that try to pry their way out of his mouth when his father beats him. Yuushi isn't made of steel either. But he'll always be there for Gakuto.


**Just a little something I thought of. Please read and review. I DON'T OWN ANYTHING~ ^^**

* * *

It hurt. God, did it hurt. The bruises and cuts that covered his body. Gakuto shivered slightly and leaned against the wall of the club. People passed him by without a second glance. No, without even a first glance. Which was fine with him. He didn't want anyone to see him. He was bruised, scratched up, and bloody.

_And I don't want the world to see me_

_'Cause I don't think they'd understand_

_When everything's meant to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am._

Why?

Why did this happen to him?

What the hell did he do to piss his father off this time? Oh... Yeah... Right. He didn't put the bowl in the right cabinet. A law punishable by a broom handle to the ribs.

Music poured out the open door of the club. There was no bouncer at the front. That probably meant it was free, and there were drugs, prostitutes, and alcohol in there.

A familiar song started playing. Gakuto had the urge to dance along. So he did. His hips popped and locked in that familiar way. Dancing was his safe haven. The only thing that made him feel worth anything. Well, that, and tennis. After a few seconds, he opened up his tennis bag (He brought it along with him after escaping his living hell of a house. He planned on playing tennis, but got distracted) and removed a fedora. He placed it on the ground and started dancing again.

Soon enough, people were gathering around and watching. Every so often, a few shiny coins and sometimes paper bills fell into the hat by grateful hands.

About an hour later, Gakuto stopped dancing and counted up the money he earned. Nice. Enough to get himself a warm cup of coffee after cleaning up in the tennis locker rooms.

After he was done showering and changing, he headed toward the local coffee shop. Almost no one was there. It was, after all, about midnight. He should be heading home soon.

After the coffee, he slipped through his open bedroom window. He crawled into bed after doctoring his wounds. He drifted into an uneasy sleep.

--

"Good afternoon!" Gakuto called as he entered the locker room.

"Afternoon, Mukahi-Senpai!" Choutarou greeted happily as he pulled on his tennis shirt.

"Good afternoon, Gakuto." Yuushi said quietly, watching him with careful eyes.

"Hurry up and get dressed." Atobe called as he left the room. "Ore-sama is ready to start."

Gakuto grabbed his uniform and slipped into one of the bathroom stalls. He always changed in the stalls, not wanting the rest of the team to see his scarred and beaten body.

"Gakuto, you coming?" Yuushi called from outside.

"Yeah, be there soon." Gakuto quickly changed and slipped out of the stall, smiling. "Thanks for waiting, Yuushi."

"Mhm..." Yuushi frowned at him. "You okay? You seem a bit stiff. And what happened to knee." His eyes zeroed in on the wound there. He got it when his father threw him to the ground.

"I just screwed up one of my flips." Gakuto replied, smiling a little. "I'll be more carefully next time."

Yuushi watched him carefully throughout the whole practice. Gakuto was off his game. After just a few matches, he was clutching his side lightly and breathing heavily.

"Gakuto, what's wrong?" Yuushi stood in front of his partner, concern covering his face.

"Nothing." Gakuto shook his head. "Might've bruised a rib with the screwed up flip. That's all."

"You really shouldn't be practicing." Yuushi reached out to touch his best friend's should, but Gakuto pulled out of his reach.

"I'm fine." Gakuto smiled a little. "Don't worry. I'll always be fine." He walked off the court and took the bottle of water Jirou offered him.

Yuushi stared after him, looking concerned.

_Cause here's my promise made tonight_

_You can count on me for life_

_Cause that's when I love you_

_When nothing you do can change my mind.  
The more I learn_

_The more I love_

_The more my heart can't get enough_

_That's when I love you. When I love you_

_No matter what._

After practice, everyone changed clothes. Gakuto, again, changed in the stalls.

"Ore-sama expects you to be on your game tomorrow." Atobe said as he passed him.

"Yes Buchou." Gakuto sighed.

Later that night, way later that night, Gakuto slipped into the house.

Where his father was waiting. Drunk. Again.

"Where the hell have you been?!" His father asked angrily.

"Practice ran late." Gakuto replied calmly. He had actually been dancing outside the club again.

"It's ten o'clock! The hell it ran that late!"

The first blow sent Gakuto crashing into the closed front door. And he took every blow after that without a single whimper. Like hell he'd give this bastard that satisfaction.

"You stupid whore!" His father snapped, slamming him against the wall. "Your sleeping around, aren't you!? For money, no doubt!"

By the time Gakuto stumbled upstairs, He had a black eye (Hello Daddy's fist), his hands were cut up (Broken glass, meet flesh. Flesh, broken glass), and he had bruises starting to form on his face (Nice too see you again, wall).

He took a quick shower, washing off all the blood. He picked as much glass as possible out of his hands, and the bandaged his wounds. Like always. It was a daily routine.

Get beat, take a shower (leaving is also a possibility. If that happens, then taking a shower at the club house is required. Then come home), bandage wounds, go to bed, wake up, go to school, avoid the questions, make up excuses, come home. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Sleep hardly came that night, though. And when it did, it was only for an hour at a time. He got maybe... an hour and a half of sleep. He wasn't up to breakfast that morning.

Nor was he up for lunch that afternoon. His excuses for the day? "I had a hardy breakfast, Yuushi, I'm not hungry. Oh, the black eye? I fell down the stairs. My hands? I was climbing a tree. The bruises? I fell out of the tree."

They worked. Or so he thought. He could've been wrong. But whatever. He was too tired to care.

Practice that afternoon was painful. After the new bruises settled in for their stay, it hurt to even breath.

"I'm fine, Yuushi." Gakuto said as he barely returned one of Shishido's hits. "Just warming up."

A short break, thank God. Gakuto moved over to Jirou, who handed him a water bottle. The sun beat down in forceful waves, making Gakuto dizzy. He tried to lift the bottle to his lips, but his hand was shaking. Terribly.

"Gakuto?" Jirou tilted his head to the side. "You alright?"

"Yeah." Gakuto breathed, waving it off. "Just..." _Think, Gakuto, think! Good excuse... _"Jut weak from Choutarou's last Scud Serve." _That's good! Really good! Kudos for you, Gakuto. Total brownie points._

"Gakuto, Choutarou didn't hit a Scud Serve." Jirou frowned a little.

_Maybe not so good, Gakuto. No brownie points for you._ "Did he not? you sure you didn't' fall asleep?"

Things started to blur together. Blues mixed with grays. When did the ground become blue? Oh... That was the sky... Hm... How'd the sky get down there? Oh... That wasn't the sky. That was Jirou's tennis bag. Maybe.

Gakuto stumbled a little and latched onto Jirou's arm so he would fall.

The acrobat struggled harshly against the crashing waves of black that tried to swallow him. _Gakuto, stay awake. Don't raise alarm._ But it was too late for that.

"Gakuto!?" Jirou sounded alarmed.

"Yuushi! Atobe! Come quick! It's Gakuto!" Jirou's panicked cry was the last thing Gakuto heard before the thrashing waves of the black sea dragged him under and didn't release him.

----

He couldn't breath. Why? Why couldn't he breath?! What was going on?!

Panic settled deep in Gakuto's chest.

Wait... No... he could breath. In... And out... Slowly... deeply...

The red-headed boy's eyes fluttered open. He was in the locker rooms. Alright. But... what happened?

"Gakuto, you're awake."

Gakuto sat up slowly and looked at Yuushi, who had adopted a spot next to him.

"Did I..." His voice was a bit horse. He cleared his throat and continued. "Did I faint?"

"Yes." Yuushi replied quietly. "You had a slight fever. The others continued practicing and I brought you in here. You're temperature was high enough for me to take off your shirt."

Gakuto blinked, then looked down.

Scars. Bruises. Scrapes. Cuts. They dotted his chest like a pretty painting. But there was nothing pretty about it.

Gakuto scrambled to grab a jacket and pull it on. It was Yuushi's jacket... it smelled good.

"You've been a bit accident prone lately, have you?" Yuushi asked quietly.

"Yeah." Gakuto muttered quietly. "I've just been trying some new stunts lately and-"

"Don't lie to me, Mukahi Gakuto." Yuushi's voice was sharp and lashed out like a whip, causing Gakuto to flinch. "Tell me the damn truth."

_And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming_

_Or the moment of truth in your lies_

_When everything seems like the movies_

_Yeah you bleed just to know your alive_

"That is the truth." Gakuto muttered quietly.

"Like hell it is." Yuushi whispered. "Gakuto, aren't we friends? Best friends? Doubles partners? You can tell me anything. What's going on. Who's hurting you? Are you... Are you hurting yourse-lf?" Yuushi's voice broke on the last word.

"Of course not!" Gakuto exclaimed.

"Then what?!" Yuushi almost shouted. "Tell me, Gakuto. Please. I beg you!"

"My father!" Gakuto finally shouted in frustration. Once he started, he couldn't stop. He let everything spill from his mouth. "It started two month ago. My father started drinking heavily. He started beating me for the smallest things. Bruised ribs. Cut up palms. Busted lips. Remember that sprained ankle I had last month? My father threw me out a second story window. If I wasn't so flexible and cat-like, it would've been worse." He couldn't stop the tears now. The tears that flowed freely down his face.

Gakuto felt arms wrap around him gently. Strong, protective arms. The arms of Yuushi. Gentle, so it didn't hurt one bit. But strong so he knew he was safe.

_And I'd give up forever to touch you_

_Cause I know that you feel me somehow_

_You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be_

_And I don't want to go home right now_

"I'll fix it, Gakuto." Yuushi murmured, cradling his best friend against his chest. "I'll fix everything and make it better. Promise."

----

_And I don't want the world to see me_

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

_When everything's made to be broken_

_I just want you to know who I am _

_-_

_'Cause I wanted to fly,_

_so you gave me your wings_

_And time held its breath so I could see, yeah_

_And you set me free _

_When I was alone_

_You came around_

_When I was down_

_You pulled me through_

_And there's nothing that_

_I wouldn't do for you _

_-_

_I found the note down in your car_

_And its not your fault it gets this hard_

_Gets this hard_

_Hold your head high_

_Don't look down_

_I'm by your side_

_Won't back down_

_You wanted a hero tonight_

_Well I'm not made of steel_

_I'm not made of steel_

_But your secrets safe with me_

* * *

**I hope you liked it! It was, personally, one of the best fics I wrote, in my opinion. ^^ The lyrics are from the songs Made of Steel by Our Lady Peace, You Set Me Free by Michelle Branch, and Iris by Goo Goo Dolls. ^^ Good songs, look 'em up. XD**


End file.
